ADAM's Turtle
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I like to talk about stuff. I also like to complain about stuff. So, this is my stuff.
No, don't look at my eyebrows (I know, I'm going to pluck them soon, girls).
Look at my zits! I've never had so much coverage! What the hell is going on here? Why now? Should I just go out and get braces and get it over with? Should I get some new tourtouise shell glasses? Do I NOT LOOK YOUNG ENOUGH, that I have to divert back ever further?
I used to just put a steaming hot washcloth on my face. No zits. Then I started getting some, so I've tried Cetaphil. Guess what? It's not working for me. So now I'm going to try St. Ives Apricot Scrub.
Which brand of face wash is for Barb? I'm going to find out. Won't it be a fun journey? Will you take it with me? I need all the help I can get.
They always cause me pain and people are ALWAYS making excuses for them...
Please excuse my shoe, it didn't know any better than to kick your dog. It was trying to protect my foot. Hello, I am a shoe!
Dogs smell! I think they smell really bad! And they slobber! Who do they think they are, licking people? It's all slimy and smelly.
Cats smell fine, you are thinking of kitty litter. So does Lysol, but I bet you would be offended if I sprayed Lysol all over your face. Nobody kisses like that.
People, hear me now. I am not going to pretend I like your dog(s) anymore. If you don't have a dog, try not to get one. From now on, I am allergic to dogs. My calf hurts.
disclaimer: I really don't mind Blue Baby.